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i'm not gonna fight for you.

i'm not gonna compete with her.

&i'm not gonna compare myself to her.

AGHHHHH this is such a bust.

off to study for a chem test tomorow

+ write my English paper.

both of which will take me forever.

wish me luck?

=/

words of wisdom:

"don't fall into the trap of the __do_____n charm!"

-chelsea wee.

life lesson.

stifling a REALLY hard laugh hurts your chest.

a LOT.

don't do it.

inspiration.

it's like a breath of fresh air.

inspiration came whizzing in today.

MAN, it felt good.

i haven't felt inspired in a long time.

yesterday, i was talking with my english teacher about my paper.

and she was talking about how when people get writer's block,

they need to get away for a little bit and spend time

with the thing that inspires them.

while she was talking, i was thinking,

"photography usually inspires me.

but it hasn't lately."

today, i came across someone's photography website.

BEAUTIFUL pictures that made me wish i didn't have

to worry about studying & school work.

i'd be taking pictures.

also today, i visited the brandstater gallery.

it was featuring a grad student's work.

all photography and graphic design stuff.

now THAT was a true breath of fresh air.

ideas started pouring in, left and right.

it made me excited again.

that was a good feeling. :)

here're a few snippets from the gallery exhibit:

*happy sigh.

if that doesn't inspire you, i don't know what does. :)

dear jph,

thank you for making me mad that one day.

idk how or why...

but our argument

(or at least me being upset at you)

taught me a lot.

i learned a lot about what goes into an argument.

what measures need to be taken on both sides.

how to pick and choose my battles.

i've changed how i talk to people when i'm upset at them.

and how i deal with things when we're working them out.

you probably don't know this about me,

but i HATE confronting people.

i used to avoid it at all costs.

so a lot of times, when i'm upset, i'll just downplay my feelings.

but being able to be completely honest with you

and learning to lay out my side so that you understood

did lengths for me.

so thank you.

i owe you one.

two steps forward, one step back.

*sigh.

well on the bright side of things,

at least that's better one step forward, two steps back...right?

right.

confused colors.

today's sky was so pretty. i was driving to LL around 4pm and was amazed with what i saw out the window. the sky was a beautiful bright blue, but also gray because the storm clouds were moving in. it couldn't make up its mind. it was like it was experiencing cognitive dissonance.

it was too beautiful to not take a picture of it, so i pulled out my cellphone & shot it. probably shouldn't be taking pictures while driving on the 91.

*don't try that at home, kids.

made my first logo today! i was so excited about that. :) now just gotta translate that sketch to photoshop. hopefully First Service will like it & use it...we'll see though. :)

premenstrualsyndrome.

i never PMS...

but when i do, it hits me HARD.

today was the third time in my life that i've had bad PMS.

not that it made every small thing bad.

i was already dealing with stuff,

but PMS exacerbated everything.

i write this blog with swollen eyes and a knot in my chest.

ugh,

today was NOT a good day.