Thursday, December 31, 2009
animal crackers, frames, & sushi.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
focus on the good, ashlee, focus on the good.
you seriously frustrate me.
i am so confused.
why is it that when i want to be friends w/ you, you don't talk to me.
but when i couldn't care less about you, you all of a sudden decide to strike up conversations w/ me?
ARRRRRGGGGH.
you're a little late for that..
JON MIN. :))))) thank you so much for making the guest list & "bill" on the spot tonight. you are quite amazing! i really appreciate you pulling that together last-minute. the parents loved it! & i especially loved the "paied" part. ;) YOU DA BEST!
nic min! :))) thank you so much for sleeping today while we were preparing..."slacker!" ;) kidding. :) thank you for everything else that you did, including cooking the garlic butter sauce...i didn't even have time to think about that w/ everything else. you don't understand how sincerely thankful i am that you, ambyr, & everyone else took care of that. & thank you for dressing like a waiter today! hehehe. PERFECT. :)
-________- steven -________- michael. thanks for singing OUT LOUD tonight & embarrassing me in front of all the neighbors. i had to apologize to everyone & pretend that i didn't know you. -_________- (what did i say about singing in public??? you're not at home, silly...) anyways, thank you so much for making the desserts for tonight. everyone really liked them. :)))) & thank you so much for making the menu on the spot! regardless of what you say or think, i really liked them. :) you're amazing..thank you! :)
my dear suelynn. :))))) we've already said this so many times to each other, but i am seriously SO happy w/ tonight. :)) i'm super happy, not only cause it was a lot of fun & the parents were happy :), but bc we proved something today...today i found out that we really can pull off something like that. i wasn't too sure in the beginning, but we proved my mom wrong & we proved ourselves wrong..it's seriously an amazing feeling! my mom wanted to thank you for being so helpful..especially in cleaning the dishes. she really appreciated how you always asked her if there was something else that needed to be cleaned, even though you had already done SO much. she loves you. :) but then again, who can't? ;) & of course, thank you for even coming up w/ the idea for tonight! i had SO much fun. :))) you have good things inside that mind of yours. ;) i love you SO MUCH. :)))
ITU MANDA. :) thank you so much for everything that you did tonight. :)) thank you for bringing the much-needed martinelli's, for helping serve & prepare the food, & for helping clean up. my mom commented on how helpful you were & how much she appreciated your willingness to help. you sweet thang, you. :) she really wished that she could've said hi to your mom tonight. :( next time, yes?! :)) oh btw, YES you should get a skype. :) it's pretty handy. hehehe. :) i love you, itu! thank you so much for everything! *including looking pretty & just being eye-candy. ;)
"machchew!" :) thank you so much for all of your help & everything that you did to contribute to tonight...from prepping the utensils & napkins, to chopping the vegetables, to doing anything & everything that i needed help with. oh! & thank you for starting off the night right by blessing the meal as well. :)) i could tell that the parents enjoyed everything tonight...& we got quite a few compliments. :)) you're amazing, matt. thank you for everything!
Monday, December 28, 2009
excitement!
but along with that, i also love the moments leading up to a big event...all the quality time spent with people planning & preparing. :) suelynn, we've planned, shopped, and driven around town for MANY hours, & they've all been really enjoyable. :)) sometimes frustrating...like w/ the green beans & parmesan cheese (note to the world: go to trader joe's...not stater brothers for fresh parmesan cheese and raspberry vinaigrette), but overall, it's been REALLY fun. :) i'm so glad that we got away with buying the stuff at costco! *wipes sweat off forehead..WHEW! :)
it was really interesting observing all of us tonight in the kitchen during the late hours & realizing that, if we all lived together, that is exactly what life would be like...steven would cook for us (mwahaha.......ambyr & i would......."cook" x]) then we'd all take turns washing, drying, & putting away dishes while shuffling songs on itunes & just talking about life. :) i think that's why i enjoyed campout so much senior year...there were parallels to tonight.
*happy sigh* i am really pleased with life at the moment. thank you God. i thank you & praise you for all of my friends & the times that we can spend together...& that even though some of us are far from each other & sometimes we lose touch, it's WONDERFUL when everyone comes back home. thank You for the opportunity that our families will have to spend time together tomorrow! please, Father, let our dinner party honor & glorify You. may we make You proud of us. :)
i love You, Daddy. :)
*ps. please be with sanga who's on the other side of the world with her family & can't join us tomorrow. please keep her safe, bless her family, & remind her that her "family" at home misses her & loves her. :)
goodnight world!
need to wake up early tomorrow to clean house! :)
Sunday, December 27, 2009
something happy. :)
thank you jon min for being patient with me. you're amazing!
good job steven! didn't do as bad as we thought you'd do. ;)
jj, you did really well, as always. i'm proud of you, bro. :)
caitlin: sorry that we didn't get to board for as long as we wanted. :(( i hope you still had fun though.
the rest of the debulgado boys/men: hope you guys had fun today! good job to all of you. :)
something that i've really learned to appreciate is the way that my mom always has food ready for my friends & i when we come back from an event. it's so comforting. my mom's amazing. :)
tomorrow is prep for the dinner party for our parents. we're gonna start cooking food, setting up tables, arranging decorations, putting together utensil placements...i am so excited! :)
happiness feels so good. :)
Friday, December 25, 2009
not again.
i was just about to write another entry...
yet again about something that's eating at me.
but i want to choose not to focus on that. :)
for several reasons:
1) it's christmas.
2) it's been way too long.
3) i deserve to be happy.
bottom line: the only one in this whole situation that's hurting is me. everyone else is doing fine, but i'm not fully letting go, so i'm the only one being hurt. that's pretty ridiculous huh? i thought so too. :)
God,
please, fill that spot in my heart until it's ready. let Your love consume me so that i won't even crave it, so that i won't even need it. please, remind me that Your love is just enough for me & that Your timing is ALWAYS perfect. let me not show mistrust in You. remind me of what heiba said..that these things come to distract me from the love that's already being shown all around me, making me not fully appreciate it & miss out on the beauty of it. satan knows my weaknesses & knows how to get to me. i don't want him to win, Daddy. please surround me. i give it up to You.
thank you for this holiday season & for the family & friends that i've been able to spend it with, and am still spending it with. as i write, i'm in the comforts of auntie angie's house, a home that i always look forward to. i'm surrounded by people that deeply care about me. & i know that all of these people's love combined & multiplied by 1020394817029384 doesn't even compare with the love that You have for me, which is totally incomprehensible. You're amazing. straight up amazing. let me not lose sight of that.
thanks Daddy.
i love you. :)
merry christmas. :)
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
jumbled.
i just...ugh. idk. i racked my brain tonight trying to figure out why. it honestly doesn't make sense...& it's not like me. but i am...& it is...
i'm so sorry..
please be patient w/ me.
maybe one day it'll be better.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
[don't] rock the boat.
curveballs were thrown at me.
just when i was content/satisfied/happy again,
something just had to rain on my parade.
i was almost expecting it,
but i really hoped that it wouldn't happen.
oh well.
at least i called it.
//
uncle jose,
the church was filled with tears on friday at your memorial service. i, too, found myself crying a lot. i wasn't super close to you, but my family means a lot to me. your death left them in a LOT of pain...i don't think you understand how much. auntie myrtle hasn't eaten in the two weeks since you died. your 8-year-old pride and joy has no father to guide him. i saw the numerous pictures of you two...you & jordan, i mean. you must have loved him a lot. i could see it in the pictures. he loved you a lot too. he still does. it's going to take him & auntie myrtle a long time to learn how to cope.
it was very strange seeing a picture of your face on the memorial service program, more like surreal. i'm used to seeing you attend memorial services, not be the cause of them. & it almost made me sick to my stomach when i saw your body in the casket. that sight confirmed everything..the fact that you truly are gone. that your life has ended. *sigh* you were so young, uncle jose...only 48. jordan needs a father. auntie myrtle needs a husband. i can't even imagine all the pain that she's dealing with. it's not like it was a divorce where she stopped loving you and you went away. she loved you so much and you were taken away from her...the both of you were celebrating your wedding anniversary in hawaii, in fact, along with jordan & oma. your leaving her was so unexpected...she wasn't prepared. this has hit her so hard.
uncle jose, it was so hard to see my family hurt so much. i know that your side of the family was in a lot of pain as well. i cried when i heard your mom wail and cry over your body after everyone had left, & i saw your brothers cry as well. but you really made an impact my family when you were here with us. opungs, aunties & uncles, cousins, nephews & nieces on my side of the family said beautiful things about you at the service. it almost seemed like my side of the family was more sad than yours. i know that that isn't true at all, but i say that to make a point as to how much my side of the family loved you. you really made a big impression on my family. they really miss you.
my whole family is praying for Jesus to come soon so that they can see you again. they're longing with all of their hearts for that day. i am too...i want my family to stop hurting...& i want to get to you know you better. i'm thankful that we'll have plenty of time for that. :) i can't wait for it. i want to hear all about your trips with auntie myrtle & jordan, all of the good times that we've all had together, and of course, all of the cars that you've repaired. ;)
rest in peace, uncle jose.
until Jesus comes.
you are greatly loved and missed.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
christmas break thus far.
everyday has had something to do or somewhere to go.
i like it like that. :)
so much to do though!
so far:
FRIDAY:
+ the fall [haven't been THERE for forever].
+ went to steven's house to welcome him home.
SATURDAY:
+ xmas party for the residents at inland temporary homes. *double rainbow that day!
+ farewell xmas party for the humanitech students.
SUNDAY:
+ errands w/ mom.
+ joshua tree w/ ambyr, steven, andrew lloren, & jon min.
+ in-n-out.
MONDAY:
+ took care of stuff at home.
+ went to steven's to cook. [saw mikee & ambyr at separate times on the way there]
+ cinnamon roll night! +potato cheddar broccoli soup...but we can forget that part.
which leads us to...
TODAY:
+ drove to rancho to shadow auntie angie, a pediatrician.
+ LA + diamond bar w/ steven and 4 other friends [3 of them from andrews]
+ wal-mart to scan cue photos
& now the rest of my busy week...
WEDNESDAY:
+ check-up at my dad's dental office
+ check the photo spot for heibs' photoshoot
+ JJ's band concert
+ hang out w/ my glendale friends
+ paint ambyr's room? if there's time?
THURSDAY:
+ heiba's photoshoot
+ newsletter meeting
FRIDAY:
+ shadow auntie angie again, except at a clinic in upland
SATURDAY:
+ something secret. :)))
SUNDAY:
+ lori's wedding! :)
& during this week, i need to/want to:
+ finish jj & leisa's banquet pictures
+ work on christmas stuff
+ clean my room
+ read "eat this, not that"
+ read my photography book
+ pick up a photoshop book from B&N
+ send my picture off to Yogurtland
+ test out my fish eye lens that's coming in a few days! already been shipped! :)
among other things.
i like being productive. :)
just gotta learn how to manage everything.
..i should be sleeping.
but i'm not tired.
=/
Monday, December 14, 2009
stardust + life.
+ PHOTOSHOP. there's so much that i want to learn! i wish i was taking the class at LSU this quarter. :(((( but no room in my schedule! agh. :( i feel like i could do so much better if i knew about all of the available resources and how they work. i feel so...inhibited right now. :( i want to learn! somebody teach me? :(
+ got the second Glee CD today, & am enjoying it to the fullest. the people on that show are honestly SO TALENTED. i'm absolutely amazed.
+ The Shack is teaching me a lot about God. i look forward to reading it every night. next book: Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis.
+ i've recently developed a genuine thirst for learning. ask me about it later. i have so much to share. :)
God is good,
ALL the time.
even when it doesn't seem like it.
*pray hard for my family please..my auntie's going through a lot. she just lost a husband & my 6-year-old cousin just lost a father. :*((( there is much stress & grief in my family right now.
Monday, November 30, 2009
hahahaha. :)
*from an email from LSU:
Researchers at Loma Linda University confirmed Harvard University research that found that laughter has the following beneficial effects on the human body:
1. "T-cells" are increased, allowing you to combat infection better. The nervous system and endocrine system are directly related to the immune system, hence, they all benefit. Continued humor usage contributes to a strengthened immune system and helps fight off future illnesses.
2. Lowering of blood pressure.
3. Decrease in sed rate, indicating a reversal of the inflammatory process.
4. Pain reduction in muscles. Laughter exercises the muscles in the diaphragm, abdomen, respiratory system, face, arms and back. Think of it as a mini-aerobic session.
5. Good for the digestive system. Perhaps it's best to play out the reversal of that. Think about how your stomach and intestines react when you are stressed, nervous or angry. Enough said.
6. Increases energy.
7. Reduces the need for prescription drugs, especially anti-depressants.
8. Reduces anger and anxiety. You feel empowered , more in control of your emotions, it "lightens" the environment around you and increases productivity. Helpful in the workplace and at home.
9. Improves self-esteem dramatically and promotes a more positive outlook.
10. Enhances the ability to learn and retain that learning. Good news for anyone.
11. Allows for a more restful sleep and a brighter outlook upon awakening.
12. Frequent laughter has a cleansing effect on the body, similar to deep breathing.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
new directions.
oh, life.
Saturday, October 31, 2009
just write it out.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
paper.
excuse typos or flaws that you find. i was pressed for time. =/
but you get the gist of it. :)
Ashlee Sumilat
ENGL 111-3
Narrative Final Draft
9 October 2009
Breathtaking scenery? Check. Best friends? Check. Sleepy eyes? Three times check. A few of my best friends and I are sitting in a circle underneath a large, white wooden cross atop one of Mt. Rubidoux’s peaks admiring the city from a different perspective and soaking in the beautiful sight. The morning sun is just rising, waking up the wildlife of Riverside, California on this balmy early-June morning. Moments earlier, the sky was fairly dark and all of the local building lights and city lights were on, transforming the scene before us from a typical, ordinary city to a beautiful black canvas dotted with different-colored glistening jewels. I’m completely captivated by it. But it was no easy trip coming up here to see this. I personally woke up at 4 o’clock this morning since we were supposed to meet at my friend’s house around 4:30 or so, making my slumber a grand total of three hours, maybe even a little less. My friends are suffering from the same amount of shut-eye, or, rather, lack thereof. We had to rush to get here because we wanted to beat the sun before it rose, and we left later than planned. The hike up wasn’t particularly enjoyable either. All of us took the shortcut, meaning that we scaled the mountain, opposed to walking up the paved path, and most of us were short of breath trying to make it to the top in time. But we’re here now, and this beautiful scene is our reward. Today is the day that we leave high school behind and we’ve chosen to celebrate it with each other in this way.
To an outsider, my group of friends and I may seem like any other high school bunch of teenagers that eat lunch together everyday and hang out on the weekends every now and then, but we are much more than that. Throughout this past year, we’ve shared our hearts and thoughts with each other while grabbing food from Ricebox or Maki Yaki, two of our favorite regulars. We’ve shared many similar interests and hobbies such as photography, volleyball, and music. There have been many times when we’ve casually gone places not expecting much--“Hey, wanna go to Yogurtlicious? Or the Mins’ house?”--and for hours spent time together, laughing and creating numerous inside jokes, establishing that event as the highlight of the week. When the good times came, we celebrated together, and when bad times rolled around, we prayed for each other until they passed. Our parents knew each person on a name-to-name basis and weren’t surprised when their house was suddenly and spontaneously filled with six or seven teenagers walking through the door saying, “Hi Auntie! Hi Uncle!” These people that I spent so much time with this year are very near and dear to my heart.
While trekking the hills behind Hulda Crooks Park in Loma Linda during one of our regular early-Sabbath-morning hikes, one of my friends suggested that we as a group get together a breakfast picnic basket during graduation weekend, climb Mt. Rubidoux, and watch the sunrise. That was several months ago, or perhaps just one month ago (I honestly can’t remember). I was skeptical as to whether or not my friend’s plan would actually come through, but here we are (most of our group anyway), graduation day, sitting on a few boulders at the top of Mt. Rubidoux watching the sunrise together. The only thing that’s missing is the breakfast picnic basket.
We all enjoy the peaceful atmosphere for a few minutes before one of my friends speaks up. He suggests that we go around the circle one-by-one and “share our troubles with each other.” With a unanimous agreement, he starts it off by talking about a few things that have been on his mind recently and then goes on to the next person.
I sit and listen to the prayer requests of my friends as they talk. Their requests range from a variety of different subjects, such as family problems and spiritual concerns, but most of them are, understandably and not surprisingly, about college: fears and anticipations, financial concerns, and the like. For so long we’ve thought and talked about college, but today legitimatizes the fact that it is indeed a reality approaching soon.
One of my friend’s “testimony” of sorts is filled with tears as he reminisces about how unhappy he was at the high school attended last year and how incredibly happy coming back to our school for senior year made him. He shares how appreciative he is of our friend group and how we are more like family to him than anything else. His sentiment is heart-warming and makes me misty-eyed. This is the first time I’ve seen him cry in a while, and the fact that he chose to let down his guards and truly be himself for a few minutes created a sense of intimacy and bonding between all of us.
The circle comes to me and it’s my turn to share. My concern/prayer request, too, is about college, but it’s different from everyone else’s. See, all of them, or at least 90 percent of them, are going to the same college. I am one of the few that is not. Originally, I was supposed to go to Pacific Union College with them, but things changed last-minute, so my college plans had to accommodate that change. So I share how upset I am about not being able to be up there with all of them. Missing out on all the inside jokes, being left out of certain experiences and memories, and even something small like not being able to complain about the same teachers is not an inviting prospect to me. With hesitance, I acknowledge the fact that things won’t be the same when we all leave for college, and I truthfully say how much that hurts, especially since I became so close to all of them just this year, so I ask for their prayers of comfort.
The last person shares the things on his mind and heart, and we decide to go around the circle one-by-one and pray for the specific prayer request of the person on our left. Someone is assigned to start and another to end, then we all bow our heads and dedicate each other to God. As we’re all sitting in this circle, fearing the uncertain future together, I can’t help but liken us to an army or a group of soldiers bracing and preparing ourselves for war. A bit overdramatic, I know, but in this moment, we’re recognizing all of the different challenges that we’ll face in the coming year, whether they be academic, spiritual, emotional, or social, and we’re choosing sharing it with each other and with God. The sacredness of the moment gives me chills.
We finish praying and give each other huge hugs while laughing a bit and wiping a few tears from each other’s eyes. One of my friends sets up his tripod and puts his camera on timer before pressing the shutter button and rushing to his designated spot. The camera beeps slowly for a few seconds then a few times rapidly before going off, photographing all of us in our positions. I ask to see the picture on the screen after my friend dismounts his camera from the tripod. He shows it to me and I stare at it, being fully appreciative of the fact that such a contraption exists to help capture what just took place under cross today. I think of the saying “A picture speaks a thousand words” and I can’t agree more. This photograph speaks of a year’s worth of laughter, an hour’s worth of memories, and a lifetime of friendships. They are ones to cherish.
Friday, September 18, 2009
post-ignite.
Friday, September 11, 2009
party of pizzas. :)
Tuesday, September 8, 2009
color prophecy.
Monday, September 7, 2009
Friday, September 4, 2009
summer lovin'.
- spent QT w/ grandparents. haven't done that in a while. g.pa rode in my car for the first time. x]
- volunteered at east campus.
- stater bros. to get nectarines & peaches.
- min's house to see nic & biff. split a cinnamon roll w/ them. i KNEW i shouldn't have gotten it. wasn't as good as it looked. -_______-
- weather: florida-like. thunder, felt a few raindrops, a bit breezy. i liked it. :)
- ambyr came over to min's. drove around for a few minutes w/ john in my trunk. "oh gosh! it's so HOT in here!!" HAHAHHAHAH. x] all i needed was a speed bump to run over.
- picked up jj from sax lesson.
- went home to eat a sandwich, drop jj off, & grab my stuff.
- ambyr's house to clean the outside of my car half-way. x]
- her grandparents' house to night swim for a while. heart-to-heart. tricep & ab workout. "cyclone." x] water felt good until we got cold.
- late-night trip to IHOP. spent forever trying to decide what i wanted to eat. & i almost changed it right after i ordered. x] i like nice waitresses that don't get annoyed. my dinner: onion rings, 2 grain&nut pancakes w/ a taste of all the syrups (i took the leftovers home & eat it for b.fast this morning!), garden scramble (scrambled eggs w/ peppers & mushrooms), & 1/2 of ambyr's hash browns. mmm mmm FULL. :)
- ambyr's house again. spent 30 min. vid. messaging sanga & steven on fb. laughed a lot. :) *dude, i didn't realize how weird i am on camera when i'm hyper. oh gosh it's scary. for those of you who saw it....just erase that from your memory. heh.
- cautiously drove home w/o a license.
- picked up matt in grand terrace.
- picked up kak jane at UCR.
- found out that kak jane & i actually met before. she came to my church once! & i helped her prom date shop for a vest & tie. small world. :)
- tapioca express to get free drinks. watermelon juice. :)
- got lost a little bit on the way to our destination. thankfully an orang tua at the gas station helped us out. kak jane gave him 75 cents when he asked for change.
- arrived at WB lot. waited in line for 2 hours. front of the line. surprisingly saw a few familiar faces. entertained ourselves by making friends. 1) meet: kevin aka kay k. DUDE. he has CONNECTIONS. he's friends w/ the people from fanny pack, quest crew, boxcuttuhs, we are heroes, & a bunch more. he even did a mix for one of the competitions. cool guy. 2) meet: becca & amber. 2 ladies from the bay area. they were really nice. :) 3) meet: ashley (heeeey! :)), mike, & daniel. asian teenagers from santa clarita, rancho, & seattle!
- STARSTRUCK:
- stood literally 2 ft away from 2 people from fanny pack for like 30 min. i could've bumped into them. it was the black girl & one of the tall white guys..will..something? forgot his name. WHOOPS. & the girl was carrying a bunch of Fanny Pack fanny packs..purple & aqua. agggh i wanted one so bad! matt & i wanted to ask her for one. x]
- saw Strikers All Stars crew come into the line we were standing in. a bunch of black guys wearing bright colors, elaborate ed hardy designs on jackets & hats, gold chains, & walking in w/ swag? not conspicuous at all. HA. x] i just watched them on youtube. they are freakin TIGHT. look them up if you don't know who they are. strikers all stars.
- saw the guy that played the police officer in seventh heaven.
- walked by george lopez's parking sign.
- walked by the stages were they filmed FRIENDS, cold case, batman and robin, ER, the mentalist, & a bunch of other shows & movies. and then of course ABDC STAGE. :)))))
- a few girls from Beat Freaks came into the rehearsal. *look them up! total ballers dude. saw the red-haired girl, the oriental girl, & a few others. sat in our section a few rows down. so did Fanny Pack and Strikers.
- the rehearsal: obviously not the actual taping. but they did tape a few shots w/ us there. "in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...applause." & standing ovation after each crew's done. their first time shooting during a rehearsal. we got to see each dance three times instead of just once since it was rehearsal. so if you missed something the first time, you got to see the next time. this one guy from Massive Monkees made my heart beat a little faster: brysen angeles. :)) i like their routines from the past weeks. We Are Heroes & Rhythm City are totally bomb. i'm totally for them. :) watch the actual show nxt wk! it's a good one. :) my new obsession: ABDC. :)
- noodle world: dinner.
- santa anita mall to get something to commemorate tonight since they made us give up our tickets & wrist bands. -__________- yag.
- fell asleep on the way home while kak jane drove.
- skyped w/ steven for half an hour. HAHA. steven your dances are so......um.....cute.... :)
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
nail polish.
- went to KFC & had deep conversations with my aunties (not relatives) while the kids played w/ their cell phones.
- watched hsm3 w/ jj. i swear i'm infatuated w/ that movie.
- talked to biff for a while.
- skimmed through one of the photography books that i ordered.
- played piano! oh wait, i already mentioned that...
ouch.
Friday, August 28, 2009
nah.
- the more intense part of the bathroom remodeling started...floor's in the process of being changed to tile, counter's in the process of being replaced with our leftover granite, and my mom & i bought a new sink! i'm so excited!

- went over to ambyr's house for the first time!
- cooked with my mom at midnight. x]
- hung out w/ mervin after he finished his orientation at LSU. tried eel for the first time.
- saw steven when he got home & talked to him for a couple of hours.
- volunteered at east campus.
- swam at drayson 3x this wk. (did 20 laps yesterday!)
















